In truth, we can only be moved to give away our power when we are, secretly, afraid to use it ourselves—afraid of the stark responsibility that comes with being power-toting adults.
Here are just some of the self-sabotaging ways we give away power we will definitely need if we’re trying to move our lives out of Trouble:
We assume a responsibility, that really doesn’t belong to us, for some aspect of another person’s well-being . . . thus putting our own agendas on hold.
We give in, conceding our right to do the things we want to do, as a peace offering to avoid conflict.
We depend on the approval of others for our sense of well-being.
We make decisions based solely on the approval and validation of some voice other than our own.
We let our fear of having-to-face-the-world-if-the-thing-we-try-to-do-fails stop us from trying.
We let past failures, mis-steps, and decisions that didn’t work out well, stop us from trying again.
We use up all of our time and energy doing things that are details on someone else’s agenda, leaving ourselves with no time or energy to create and carry out our own agendas.
Realize, right now, that any power that a person seems to have over your life was given to them, by you, and stoked by your own fear-notions and low beliefs about yourself and your capabilities. Most of our lack-of-power issues are fear-based, in that we fear losing some emotional element of the comfort zone we’ve created for ourselves in Trouble. The only way to re-claim your power is to take it back one step at a time . . . by making one high-belief decision at a time.
Think about it. What changes could come about in your life if you were to make some of the following changes? –
Stop trying to please everyone else and begin to start pleasing yourself
Realize that success at anything is part of a process that includes some failure
Stop viewing failure as an acceptable
endpoint of any effort you make
Begin to re-claim some of the time, energy, and resources that you’ve been giving to the interests of others, and use them for your own interests
Start saying “no”, when “no” is what you’re feeling
Practice listening for your own voice. The more you listen, the more you will hear your spirit offering you her wisdom and guidance. Honor that voice. It’s a God-given gift for you! We sabotage ourselves and our efforts when we keep choosing others’ voices over our own.
Excerpt from From Trouble to High Places: Meditations for Women Who Are So Ready to Cross the Bridges that Lead to Joy! Copyright 2009 Esther Davis-Thompson